I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Help. Why am I so naked?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
