I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
