pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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