well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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