Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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