She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize