we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
