At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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