shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
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