i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
