Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
