I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
