i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
