i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
