A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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