its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
He has the fingertips of a God
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
