It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
