You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
