if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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