We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I think I sprained my soul last night
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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