I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
