I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize