didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
