Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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