dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize