I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
