i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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