Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
