Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Screwed.edu
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Randomize
