I wannas sexs uuuuu
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
