You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize