I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
