yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
