I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize