i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
