In the future we'll all be gay
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize