i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
