okay pat passed out under dana's car
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
