You made me cry and you don't even care
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
