Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
