Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
