The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
