Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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