I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
