we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
