Don't you send me to vm
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize