Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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