I heard we made out
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize