She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
