To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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