After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
