If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
