doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
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