Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
