...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
