My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
